Summary Report - 90210

Spoiler alert: Don't bother looking if you haven't seen the episode

Old School:

Total number of lines uttered by Jennie Garth: Maybe 20, if I'm being generous

Who's aged better, Jennie or Shannen?: Jennie.  Looks like Shannen was bitten by the botox bug

Best old to new show tie-in: Silver, otherwise known as Kelly's little sister, Erin - whose father still has a serious cheating problem and whose mother is still an alcoholic coke-addict

Best blink and you'll miss it tie-in: "Is that girl 30?" Hannah Zuckerman-Vasquez (daughter of Andrea and Jesse) delivering the video news.

Best unanswered question: You only think Kelly's throw-away line about Brandon calling from Belize means that he's her baby-daddy.  But I bet my life (okay, maybe not my life) that Sammy is part McKay.

Best received cameo- Joe E. Tata.  He may look a little stringy, but Nat is still Nat

Worst explanation for an old cast member's arrival: Brenda coming to direct "Spring Awakening" which already has a director, who as far as we saw, was never fired.

Still waiting for updates on: Steve, Donna, David, Dylan (I'm assuming anyone who did not attend West Beverly will not make the role call)

Most anticipated cameo: Jackie Taylor!!  Who's not psyched for that?

New School:

Best character: Tabitha.  I don't care that Jessica Walters has many, many years on the rest of the cast.  She danced rings around them every time she was on screen.  "Arrested Development" represent!

Worst character: George.  What is the point of the sap of screen energy?

Love child of Jason Priestley and Luke Perry: Dustin Milligan (AKA, Ethan the jock).  Eyes of Priestley, sideburns of Perry - a little bad boy in a moral package.  And don't tell me when they did the shot of him coming out of the ocean that he wasn't a dead ringer for Dylan McKay

See it coming from a mile away: Naomi stealing Annie's paper after she ridiculously offered it up.  The upcoming storyline (I'm assuming) when Adrianna's drug abuse catches up with her and Annie gets the lead in the school play and is then probably betrayed by her new leading man love interest, thereby clearing the path for her to reunite with Ethan and start a girlfight with Naomi.  But I'm just guessing.

Best new character: Ryan Matthews, the hot teacher who inappropriately shows up at student hot-spots and appears to be hitting on at least three characters, two of which are students.

Worst dialogue: Did they actually use the word "puss" twice in one sentence.  I'm pretty sure they did.

Character most likely to meet the fate of Scott Scott Scanlon: Adrianna.  It's that terrible black wig.  It's just asking for trouble.

Conclusion: The new Walsh kids aren't nearly as interesting as the old ones, but it's early yet.  Kelly Taylor was clearly written into several scenes she was not intended to be in and therefore, has no choice but to smile and nod.  More old school cameos means a better time for all involved.